October 14, 2011
It’s hard to believe that it has already been nine months and at the same time it’s like you’ve always been here. You have finally been with us as long as it took you to get here.
The 38 weeks I was pregnant with you were the happiest, scariest, and most filled with hope and dreams months of my life. I was
thrilled to find out I was having you and when the day finally came to go to the hospital to have you I was ready to meet you.
When you were born I was just staring at you from the bed as the nurses cleaned and examined you. I think those few minutes have been the scariest in my life so far – was everything alright with you? when would I get to hold you? did I deserve you? It was so surreal, you were actually here and you were mine.
You slept a lot but those few days I would keep you in the bed with me or in my arms and just look at you. I wanted to study your face every second I could. I wanted to touch your little fingers and, even though I wanted to keep them warm, I loved touching your little feet when they would escape from the blanket.
We had a rough patch as reality set in and your father and I were new parents trying to figure out how to help you and care for you the best we could. As sleep deprived as those earlier months were, I still found myself awake thinking about you and hoping I was doing the best for you. Thankfully, we get to join the ranks of people that made it through.
You nine months now and, though you are still a baby, I can see toddlerhood coming up fast. You’ve been holding your head up to look at people since you were a few days old, sitting up since about three months, and crawling since about 6 months. You pull up on anything that isn’t flat on the ground, cruise on anything you can get your hands on, and have already taken a few steps by yourself here and there. You climbed up the levels at the playground the other day all by yourself. I have to stop myself from looking too far into the future to your steps across a stage somewhere getting your diploma and just enjoy this time now.
I’ve been taking you to a nearby splash park over the summer months and it’s been interesting to watch you get more inquisitive each time we go. Each time you are stronger and get more eager to explore the water. You like to put your hand out to feel the water land on your hand. You try to catch it leaves floating by – by the way you also seem to enjoy putting leaves in your mouth because if there are any nearby they will find their way there. You like smacking your hand or rubbing your toys on the ground and watching the water that splashes back up.
You are babbling a whole slew off sounds now. I’m sure it won’t be too long before you are saying Mama, Dada and probably doggie or kitty since you light up and get excited anytime when off them is nearby or walks in the room. Now, if we could just get you to pet them gently instead of pulling their fur out and trying to grab their whiskers.
One day you are going to be a beautiful young lady with the world at your feet, but for now you want me to hold you and be near. You like to smile at me and I love smiling back at that two tooth grin (you have your lower left and upper right front teeth starting to come in, my little Jackie lantern). You laugh so easily. You are observant around other people and tend to just
watch and figure things out – ask me about WeePlay sometime. I get comments all the time about what a good baby you are, how quiet you are, how well-behaved you are, etc when we are out and about.
I enjoy that we are starting to be able to have meals together as a family. Right now you are still on fruit and vegetable purees but
you are starting to learn how to use those front teeth on big chunks of food like watermelon. You like having something in each hand and still eat with both hands. You are a Cheerios junkie and love them at all times of the day, diving into them as soon as I have put them down for you and leaving a trail of them wherever we go. (By the way, your Aunt Erin says it is perfectly fine to continue to do that into adulthood.) You also like to try to eat spaghetti noodles and green beans but actually succeed at eating peas, actually you end up putting a bunch in your mouth at the same time – some actually get swallowed, some hang around
in your cheeks for a while. I’m hoping you’ll figure out that you don’t need to put ten of something in your mouth at the same time some time soon.
I still like to look at your face when you are sleeping in my arms – your long eyelashes and pouty lips and cute little nose. I love
feeling your little hands on my arm or chest when you gently scratch me while you nurse. I still stop and wonder what color your hair and eyes and going to look like finally and who you will end up looking most like. (Your eyes started off blue but gradually turned a greenish-brown so far. Your hair is a light brown – light in the sun but dark when wet. You started off looking a lot like
me but have gradually started looking more like your father.)
You have slowly become a little person, not just an eating and sleeping machine. You are clapping your hands and shaking your
toys. You look to play with books and starting to get the hang of turning pages, even if I’m not done reading what is on the page. You like to close things – lids, books, etc. You like playing with your reflection in the mirror. You do the cutest little poses playing with a hula hoop. You definitely know what a camera is and stop whatever you are doing when it comes out. You also love to try to
get the remotes (we’ve given you one to a tv that is not plugged in so you won’t come after ours), our cell phones (you’ve made a few calls), the laptop (I bought you a laptop toy that you’ll play with for a little when I’m on mine), and the cameras.
There are so many things I want for you and hope to give you a life filled with happiness. For now, however, I just really hope to enjoy each day with you and watch you grow and develop before my eyes.
I love you so much, Kelsey girl.